Tag: Loneliness

The future of aging services may depend less on adding more programs and more on rebuilding something many communities have quietly lost: human connection. 

Across healthcare, caregiving and senior living, loneliness and isolation are increasingly driving both physical and emotional health challenges, forcing organizations to rethink how care, housing and support systems are designed for a rapidly aging population. That was the focus of a recent conversation on Varsity’s weekly Roundtable featuring Angela Bovill of Ascentria Care Alliance, who shared insights drawn from decades of experience across the broader human services landscape. Below are a few Fresh Perspectives from her discussion.

ISOLATION MAY BE THE BIGGEST HEALTH CRISIS WE’RE OVERLOOKING

Across nearly every population Ascentria serves, loneliness and disconnection are driving both mental and physical health challenges. Aging services can’t just focus on care delivery anymore — they also have to rebuild human connection and community.

PEOPLE DON’T LIVE THEIR LIVES IN CATEGORIES

Aging, disability, caregiving, immigration status and economic hardship often overlap in the same person or family. Systems built around isolated labels and funding silos don’t reflect how people actually live or what holistic care truly requires.

AI SHOULD REDUCE ADMINISTRATIVE BURDEN, NOT REPLACE HUMAN CARE

Technology can absolutely help streamline paperwork, compliance and back-office work, but replacing companionship, empathy and trust with AI risks deepening the very isolation already harming people.

MULTIGENERATIONAL AND SHARED LIVING MODELS ARE LIKELY TO GROW

Traditional aging-in-place models may become increasingly difficult as workforce shortages intensify. ADUs, co-living arrangements and multigenerational housing could become more practical, affordable and socially connected alternatives.

SENIOR LIVING COMMUNITIES NEED TO MOVE BEYOND “CARETAKING”

Older adults still want purpose, contribution and engagement with broader communities. Future models will need to create opportunities for residents to mentor, volunteer, work and remain integrated into everyday life rather than simply being cared for.

SOCIAL ENTERPRISES CAN CREATE BOTH IMPACT AND FINANCIAL STABILITY

By turning mission-driven expertise into sustainable businesses, organizations can generate revenue, create jobs and reduce dependence on shifting government funding or donor priorities.

THE FUTURE OF AGING SERVICES WILL REQUIRE BIGGER, MORE CREATIVE THINKING

Current systems were largely built for a different era of family structure, economics and longevity. Solving today’s aging challenges will require reimagining housing, caregiving, workforce development and community connection at the same time.

Aging rarely happens the way people expect. It arrives gradually, bringing changes in identity, relationships and perspective that can feel difficult to navigate. In a recent episode of Varsity’s Roundtable Talk, Derek sat down with bestselling author, cartoonist and former special education teacher J.J. Hubal, whose book Goodbye Old, Hello Bold uses humor and visual storytelling to explore the realities of growing older with more curiosity and courage.

In their conversation, Derek and J.J. discussed why aging often creates anxiety, how humor can make difficult topics more approachable and why reinvention becomes increasingly important later in life. J.J. also shared personal reflections on loneliness, friendship, creativity and the importance of continuing to step outside your comfort zone as you age.

Check out the full episode here.

WHAT DOES “HELLO BOLD” MEAN TO YOU?

I started the whole project at about 72 years old and I had the old part down, but I definitely didn’t have the bold part. So I’m the perfect author. I had zero bold. To me, bold is different things for different people. Sometimes it’s something very small. Sometimes it’s something very large. Most of my time was spent wallowing in self-pity that life hadn’t worked out for this reason, that reason. The whole project was really a search for bold. I didn’t start it even as a book. I certainly didn’t start it with a whole pile of bold ideas. I had absolutely nothing.

WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE APPROACH AGING WITH ANXIETY INSTEAD OF CURIOSITY?

I think people get stuck in the negative, what didn’t go right. We also fill our minds with things that aren’t realistic anymore. There’s nobody blazing the trail for us. We’re pioneers. There are 10,000 boomers turning 65 every day and millions turning 80. You’re overwhelmed with loss and change. All loss causes change and even change you choose ends up with losses. You just have fewer people. If you’ve lost health, money, people or security, all of those things keep us stuck for a while.

WHY IS HUMOR SUCH A POWERFUL TOOL WHEN TALKING ABOUT AGING?

Humor is a powerful tool for talking about anything sensitive or difficult. Adding a cartoon takes you out of a live person saying something. It’s just a drawing. Humor makes the medicine go down easier. Reality can be a tough thing to deal with. The old humor acts like a spoonful of sugar. It lets people face difficult truths without feeling attacked or overwhelmed.

HOW IS THE CULTURAL NARRATIVE AROUND AGING CHANGING?

It’s definitely changing and it’s most evident in media and advertising. Years ago, if somebody was even 50, it was treated like they were almost ready for the grave. Now it’s becoming more natural. We’re investing less in clinging tooth and nail to old images and more in what’s next. People are experimenting more. We’ve opened up both ends of the spectrum. I see younger generations being less rigid too. There’s more freedom now to age honestly.

WHAT ARE SOME OF THE BIGGEST FEARS PEOPLE HAVE ABOUT AGING?

One of the most popular cartoons I’ve done is just a sign in a yard that says, ‘Estate Sale: Everything My Children Told Me They Don’t Want to Inherit.’ People react to it because the stuff we hang onto has emotional power. It represents pieces of our lives, our history, our memories. It’s not just about cleaning out a room. It’s about realizing the past isn’t coming back. I had to stop looking backward and understand that I was stopping any positive input into my life.

QUOTES

“One day I was young and I went to bed. I woke up. I was old. That’s how it happens. Suddenly, without warning, you’re there.” (J.J.)

“It was really a search for bold. I didn’t start it even as a book. I certainly didn’t start it with a whole pile of bold ideas. I had absolutely nothing.” (J.J.)

“Everybody’s got a story. Everybody’s got stuff. You can’t base a relationship on sharing your victim story, or at least not very long or successfully.” (J.J.)

“I think a thumbnail definition of bold is facing reality and stepping up and doing what you need to do.” (J.J.)

“Getting older is a very big deal. Anyone who says it happened in a different way or that getting old is no big deal is a liar, liar, pants on fire.” (J.J.)

“Humor is a powerful tool for talking about anything sensitive or difficult.” (J.J.)

“As long as you’re fighting the word old, you’re never going to move forward.” (J.J.)

“Every time someone dies, it’s like a small library burning down.” (J.J.)

“Fear of the future and longing for the past can keep you stuck in place.” (J.J.)

“The good news is your world can get bigger much faster than it took for it to shrink.” (J.J.)

“Nobody was going to rescue me. I had to make this happen.” (J.J.)

“Be careful who you invest time in. How many viable years do I really have left? I don’t have a lot of time to make big mistakes with.” (J.J.)

NOTES

J.J. Hubal is a bestselling author, cartoonist and former special education teacher whose work explores aging through humor, honesty and visual storytelling. Her book Goodbye Old, Hello Bold encourages readers to rethink aging, embrace change and approach later life with more curiosity, courage and self-awareness.

J.J. Hubal is the author of Goodbye Old, Hello Bold, a visually driven book that blends cartoons, essays and reflections on aging. Through humor and deeply personal observations, the book addresses topics like loneliness, grief, reinvention, friendship and resilience while encouraging readers to embrace the realities of growing older.

Hubal spent decades working as a special education teacher before fully embracing writing and cartooning later in life. She has published cartoons and essays for years, with many of her cartoons focused on aging, memory, relationships and the realities of later life. She currently lives in Savannah, Georgia, where she continues writing, drawing and speaking about aging, creativity and personal growth.

J.J. said aging often creates anxiety because people become overwhelmed by loss, change and unrealistic expectations about what later life is supposed to look like.

She described “bold” as facing reality honestly and stepping up to do what needs to be done, even when the actions are small or unnoticed by others.

J.J. explained that humor helps people approach difficult conversations about aging because cartoons and comedy create emotional distance while still communicating truth.

She shared that many of the cultural narratives around aging are shifting, including the growing acceptance of using the word “old” openly and honestly.

J.J. talked about how loneliness became a turning point in her own life and inspired her to actively seek new friendships, experiences and communities.

She discussed the importance of staying open to reinvention later in life and said even small steps, like attending an art class or joining a group, can dramatically expand someone’s world.

J.J. emphasized that many fears around aging stem from clinging too tightly to the past instead of creating space for new experiences, relationships and possibilities.

She encouraged people to think proactively about aging by preparing emotionally, socially and practically for future changes rather than waiting until challenges become crises.

Loneliness in senior living isn’t just a human challenge, it’s an operational one. As resident needs grow and staffing resources tighten, communities are being forced to rethink how care is delivered, supported and sustained. Technology is starting to play a more meaningful role, not as a replacement for human connection, but as a way to strengthen it.

That was the focus of a recent conversation on Varsity’s weekly Roundtable, where we welcomed Josh Sach, co-founder and CEO of Meela. Josh shared how his AI-powered platform functions less like a tool and more like an added team member, supporting residents through conversation while also handling repetitive tasks that free up staff time. Below are a few Fresh Perspectives from his discussion.

AI DOESN’T REPLACE CARE, IT REFOCUSES IT

The goal isn’t fewer staff, it’s better use of staff. When repetitive tasks are automated, teams can spend more time where it matters most: with residents.

SIMPLICITY DRIVES ADOPTION

Older adults don’t resist technology, they resist friction. When tools are intuitive, accessible, and actually helpful, adoption happens faster than expected.

THE CARE GAP ISN’T COMING, IT’S HERE

With 10,000 seniors aging in daily and caregiver ratios shrinking, the system won’t hold without support. Technology isn’t optional, it is the pressure valve that must be released.

CONNECTION CAN BE SUPPORTED, NOT REPLACED

Consistent conversation and engagement can measurably reduce loneliness and anxiety, but the goal is always to complement human relationships, not substitute them.

DATA IS THE NEW WORD OF MOUTH

Aggregated resident feedback turns everyday conversations into real-time insights and authentic marketing proof points without compromising privacy.

THE FIRST 30 DAYS DEFINE EVERYTHING

Transition into senior living is where isolation and attrition peak. Early signals, surfaced through conversation and survey questions Meela, create opportunities to intervene before residents disengage.

Varsity’s Roundtable is a weekly virtual gathering of senior living marketers and leaders from across the nation. For updates about future weekly Roundtable gatherings, submit your name and email address here. 

QUOTES

“We have been fed a steady diet of inaccurate information about growing older, and that information is that it’s all decline. And the truth is in the literature that there are many things that get better as you get older. We don’t care as much what people think about us, we appreciate our connections more, and we have greater potential for problem solving.” (Dr. Burnight)

“I’ve just been amazed by, like, who would think that a book on aging would become a New York Times bestseller? I mean, that’s where people are in recognizing these 100-year lives and recognizing that the status quo is not sufficient.” (Dr. Burnight)

“There were times where I had my head down on the keyboard crying because it was so hard because I wanted to bring in all the research, but I also wanted to make it really readable. And so I just kept thinking, simplify, simplify.” (Dr. Burnight)

“When I realized that the American Psychological Association defines joy as well-being and satisfaction, it made me realize that joy isn’t this like happy, happy, you know. It’s the opposite of toxic positivity.” (Dr. Burnight)

“What they said is that happiness is often circumstantially dependent, whereas joy can exist even in challenge because it’s an inside out phenomena. And that was an ah-ha moment for me.” (Dr. Burnight)

“I don’t know any older adults who haven’t had significant challenges. That is the nature of being a human. And we’re going to have those challenges. So it isn’t that we’re going to control for everything. That’s impossible. It’s that we’re going to find a way to have joy anyway.” (Dr. Burnight)

“What the research shows us is that genetics predicts between 13% and 25% of our aging experience. So the vast majority is up to us.” (Dr. Burnight)

“One utterly suffered, and it was such a rough road, and it was really hard to be around her. And then the other one had found this ability to be content, and we couldn’t get enough of her… we watched that it is possible to walk with grief and joy.” (Dr. Burnight)

NOTES

Dr. Kerry Burnight is a nationally recognized gerontologist, author, speaker and advocate with more than three decades of experience working with older adults and families. Her work focuses on aging, joy, well-being, elder abuse prevention and redefining longevity beyond decline.

Dr. Burnight is the author of JoySpan, a New York Times bestseller that reframes aging by emphasizing joy, adaptability and meaning alongside lifespan and healthspan. She is also a co-founder of the Elder Abuse Forensic Center and a leader in research-driven aging policy and practice.

Joy is not fleeting happiness but a deeper sense of well-being that can coexist with hardship and challenge.

Genetics play a smaller role in aging outcomes than commonly believed, with most of the aging experience shaped by behavior and mindset.

Joy and well-being can be intentionally built through daily practices, much like physical health.

People who thrive in long lives consistently invest in growth, connection, adaptability and contribution.

Aging is not solely defined by decline; many cognitive, emotional and relational strengths improve with age.

Gratitude and attention shape perception, influencing both mood and social connection.

Loneliness is best addressed through proactive effort, including initiating relationships rather than waiting to be invited.

Society, policy and senior living environments must move away from infantilizing older adults and toward dignity, choice and purpose.

In an era where the average person feels more connected than ever, the issue of loneliness among seniors is becoming disconcerting. Boomers, Xers and Millennials have adapted to a social world that revolves around mobile technology, yet seniors are becoming increasingly disassociated from their families. So, what’s the root cause of this problem, and how can we address it as aging services professionals?

According to the latest U.S. Census Bureau data, about 28 percent of people aged 65 and older are living alone. As one ages, the chances of living alone increase. This makes sense, as spouses pass away and children move out. Of course, living alone doesn’t immediately make someone lonely, but we can all agree that it’s a step in the direction of loneliness.

Becoming a single-person household can start a chain reaction that leads to larger, wide-ranging problems. Studies have shown that older adults that feel lonely or isolated will begin displaying behaviors that make them increasingly more difficult to interact with in social situations, thus pushing friends and relatives even further away. This, of course, only makes the person feel more lonely, creating a vicious psychological cycle.

The negative implications of a lonely lifestyle are numerous. Isolated and lonely seniors have a 59 percent greater risk of mental and physical decline and show a 45 percent mortality increase. Of those living alone, one in seven is suffering from some kind of dementia, which can go undetected if a person isn’t engaging in regular social interactions.

Family dynamics have also changed. At one time, a child might have gone to visit his or her parents once or twice a month. Now, the number of in-person visits is dwindling, being replaced by less-frequent phone calls or perhaps the use of Skype and FaceTime. These technological visits don’t have the same effect for seniors that in-person interaction does.

One statistic of special note for aging services providers comes from data reported by AARP: Forty-five percent of people aged 45 or older who have lived in their current residence less than one year reported feeling lonely. Let that sink in for a minute!

Even in our vibrant, active communities — filled with intelligent and engaged residents and staff — new residents can feel especially lonely and isolated. It can become difficult for them to make new friends, navigate the social structure of your community and become involved in a meaningful way. Ensuring that each new resident is paired with a neighbor to show them the ropes when he or she moves in is vitally important.

The social workers at aging services communities are on the frontlines of the battle against loneliness, but each associate at your community should be on the lookout for signs of self-seclusion or withdrawal. Protecting residents, both physically and mentally, is an important part of each team member’s job.

Sources:

https://www.aarp.org/research/topics/life/info-2014/loneliness_2010.html

https://www.aplaceformom.com/blog/10-17-14-facts-about-senior-isolation/