Tag: personal growth

Growth doesn’t stop with age, but it often begins with stepping outside your comfort zone. That was the topic in a recent episode of Varsity’s Roundtable Talk. In that conversation, Derek sat down with award-winning journalist and bestselling author Chris Ballard to discuss his new book, The Plunge, and what cold-water immersion can teach us about resilience, health and aging.

Chris explored the science behind cold plunging, why swimming is one of the best lifelong activities, how embracing discomfort can build resilience, and why confidence comes from taking action, not waiting until you feel ready. He also shared lessons from reporting on extraordinary people who continue to challenge themselves well into later life.

Check out the full episode here.

WHAT HAPPENS TO THE BODY DURING COLD EXPOSURE?

At first, your body reacts as if it’s facing a threat. Adrenaline surges, your heart rate increases and you become extremely alert. But after about 90 seconds, something remarkable happens. Your body shifts into a calmer, more controlled state. Researchers have found it’s one of the few ways to become both highly alert and deeply calm at the same time. Over time, regular cold exposure may also help improve resilience and lower overall stress levels.

SHOULD WE INTENTIONALLY SEEK DISCOMFORT AS WE AGE?

Absolutely. The key is choosing healthy forms of discomfort instead of letting life simply become more comfortable. Whether it’s cold exposure, exercise or trying something completely new, those small, intentional challenges build resilience. As we age, it’s easy to settle into routines, but growth usually happens just outside of them. The challenge doesn’t have to be dramatic. It just has to push you a little beyond where you’re comfortable.

WHY IS SWIMMING SUCH A GOOD ACTIVITY AS WE AGE?

Swimming checks so many boxes. It’s easy on the joints, which becomes increasingly important as we get older, but it still provides a terrific cardiovascular workout. The water also creates gentle compression that improves circulation, and because you’re horizontal, there are additional cardiovascular benefits. Unlike many sports, swimming can adapt to different body types and fitness levels, making it something people can enjoy well into their 80s and 90s.

WHAT’S A REALISTIC WAY TO ADD MORE ADVENTURE TO LIFE?

Pick something that scares you just a little and try it. It doesn’t have to be skydiving or swimming in icy water. The goal is simply to step outside your routine. Novelty keeps us engaged, gives us something to work toward and reminds us we’re still growing. The more often you challenge yourself, the more natural it becomes to keep seeking new experiences.

IF THERE’S ONE LESSON YOU HOPE PEOPLE TAKE AWAY FROM YOUR REPORTING, WHAT IS IT?

Never underestimate yourself. I spent three years reporting on people who continually surprised themselves by trying new things later in life. That became my own experience as well. It’s easy to think, “I’m too old for that,” or, “That’s not who I am anymore.” But we often discover new abilities and new purpose only after we’re willing to step outside our comfort zone.

Every one of us is aging, yet most of us think of it as something that happens to other people later in life. Recently on Varsity’s Roundtable Talk, Derek sat down with writer, editor and Oldster founder Sari Botton to explore why growing older is a lifelong experience. 

Through her writing and community, Botton is helping reshape the conversation around aging by bringing together perspectives from every generation. In their conversation, Derek and Sari discuss why our youth-obsessed culture fuels fear of aging, how intergenerational conversations can replace anxiety with optimism, and why there is no universal timeline for life’s milestones.

Check out the full episode here.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN THAT “EVERYONE IS AN OLDSTER”?

I’ve been thinking about what it means to get older since I was about 10 years old. Throughout life, we’re constantly leaving one version of ourselves behind to become the next. We leave grade school for middle school, high school for college, one job for another, one relationship for the next. 

Every stage brings its own expectations, questions and even grief. That’s why I say everyone is an oldster. Aging isn’t something that suddenly begins at 65. It’s something we experience throughout our entire lives, whether we’re thinking about careers, relationships, children or changes in our bodies.

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO SOMEONE WHO FEELS LIKE THEY’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME?

I’d encourage them to ask, “What can I still do?” We don’t know how much time any of us has, but we can be intentional with whatever time remains. Rather than focusing on opportunities you may have missed, think about the goals that are still possible today. It’s never too late to pursue something meaningful. Maybe it won’t happen exactly the way you imagined years ago, but you can still make room for the things that matter most to you now.

DOES GETTING OLDER GIVE PEOPLE MORE FREEDOM TO REINVENT THEMSELVES?

Absolutely. I hear from people all the time who reinvent themselves later in life. They retire, discover interests they never had time to pursue, start new careers, develop creative passions or simply realize they finally have permission to try something different. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned through Oldster is that there is so much possibility in getting older. We often focus on what aging takes away, but we don’t talk enough about everything it can make possible.

HOW CAN WE COMBAT AGEISM AS A SOCIETY?

I think ageism largely comes from ignorance. People don’t really know what older adults are like or how capable they continue to be. That’s why I’m committed to making Oldster an intergenerational conversation. When people share their stories across generations, they begin to understand one another. Younger people realize that someone in their 60s or 70s is still living a full, engaged life, while older adults gain a better understanding of younger generations. The more we hear one another’s experiences, the more empathy we build and the less room there is for ageist assumptions.

QUOTES

“Everyone is an oldster. We deal with aspects of physical and emotional aging all the time. It’s not just an old person thing.” (Sari)

“We live in an ageist, youth-obsessed culture driven by capitalism. There’s money to be made by making aging a problem that needs to be solved.” (Sari)

“There’s no going back. You’re going to leave some things behind. That anxiety has morphed into curiosity about what other people’s experience is of getting older.” (Sari)

“When we’re not looking at ourselves in a mirror, we have these ideas of who we are that are based on past versions of ourselves.” (Sari)

“The intergenerational conversation happening on Oldster is helping people feel less trepidatious about aging. It certainly has for me.” (Sari)

“People kept telling me, ‘My life took off at 60… 65… 70… 75.’ They found new partners, new careers, stopped caring what other people thought and started taking risks. That really comforted me.” (Sari)

“Whenever we can really exhibit humanity in its truest form, it’s good. It reminds people they’re not alone in their humanity or their messiness.” (Sari)

“I like myself better than I ever have because I’ve become more myself. I’ve stopped trying to be who I think other people want me to be.” (Sari)

“I’m really just shooting my shot, and it’s paying off. As I get older, more confident and more skilled, I’ll shoot even bigger shots.” (Sari)

“I would say to anyone who feels behind in life: You do you. It’s okay not to be on track with everyone else.” (Sari)

“There is so much possibility in getting older. That’s one of the best things I’ve discovered.” (Sari)

“There isn’t just one right path. If you really listen to yourself and be your true self, you’ll find your right path. It might not match other people’s, but it will take you where you belong.” (Sari)

NOTES

Sari Botton is a writer, editor and founder of Oldster, a Substack publication exploring the emotional, cultural and personal realities of aging at every stage of life. A longtime journalist and essayist, she has become a leading voice challenging traditional narratives around growing older through deeply personal storytelling and intergenerational conversation.

Oldster is a reader-supported publication on Substack dedicated to reframing aging as a lifelong experience rather than something that begins in old age. Through essays, interviews and community discussions, it brings together readers of all ages to examine identity, relationships, purpose, grief, reinvention and the many realities of getting older.

Before launching Oldster, Botton served as an editor at Longreads, where she created the “Fine Lines” series that inspired the publication. She also edited the bestselling anthologies Goodbye to All That: Writers on Loving and Leaving New York and Never Can Say Goodbye: Writers on Their Unshakable Love for New York. She is currently working on an Oldster anthology expected in 2027, with plans for a podcast and television series that will continue expanding the conversation around aging.

Botton believes aging doesn’t begin at a specific age. She argues that everyone experiences aging throughout life as they move from one stage to the next, continually leaving behind previous versions of themselves.

She says our culture’s obsession with youth has turned aging into a problem to be solved, often fueled by marketing that profits from people’s fears about getting older.

One of the greatest benefits of the Oldster community has been creating conversations between generations. Hearing older adults share stories about finding new careers, relationships and purpose later in life helped ease her own anxiety about turning 60.

Botton believes one of the most overlooked realities of aging is grief—not only over physical changes, but also over saying goodbye to earlier versions of ourselves, changing relationships and unrealized dreams.

She encourages anyone who feels behind in life to stop comparing themselves to others and recognize there is no universal timeline. Every person’s path unfolds differently, and authenticity matters more than keeping pace with peers.

Rather than presenting an idealized version of aging, Botton believes sharing the messy, imperfect parts of life helps people realize they aren’t alone and creates deeper human connection.

Looking back on her own journey, Botton says growing older has made her more comfortable with herself, more willing to take risks and more interested in pursuing new creative passions. She believes aging brings far more possibility than most people realize.

QUOTES

“One day I was young and I went to bed. I woke up. I was old. That’s how it happens. Suddenly, without warning, you’re there.” (J.J.)

“It was really a search for bold. I didn’t start it even as a book. I certainly didn’t start it with a whole pile of bold ideas. I had absolutely nothing.” (J.J.)

“Everybody’s got a story. Everybody’s got stuff. You can’t base a relationship on sharing your victim story, or at least not very long or successfully.” (J.J.)

“I think a thumbnail definition of bold is facing reality and stepping up and doing what you need to do.” (J.J.)

“Getting older is a very big deal. Anyone who says it happened in a different way or that getting old is no big deal is a liar, liar, pants on fire.” (J.J.)

“Humor is a powerful tool for talking about anything sensitive or difficult.” (J.J.)

“As long as you’re fighting the word old, you’re never going to move forward.” (J.J.)

“Every time someone dies, it’s like a small library burning down.” (J.J.)

“Fear of the future and longing for the past can keep you stuck in place.” (J.J.)

“The good news is your world can get bigger much faster than it took for it to shrink.” (J.J.)

“Nobody was going to rescue me. I had to make this happen.” (J.J.)

“Be careful who you invest time in. How many viable years do I really have left? I don’t have a lot of time to make big mistakes with.” (J.J.)

NOTES

J.J. Hubal is a bestselling author, cartoonist and former special education teacher whose work explores aging through humor, honesty and visual storytelling. Her book Goodbye Old, Hello Bold encourages readers to rethink aging, embrace change and approach later life with more curiosity, courage and self-awareness.

J.J. Hubal is the author of Goodbye Old, Hello Bold, a visually driven book that blends cartoons, essays and reflections on aging. Through humor and deeply personal observations, the book addresses topics like loneliness, grief, reinvention, friendship and resilience while encouraging readers to embrace the realities of growing older.

Hubal spent decades working as a special education teacher before fully embracing writing and cartooning later in life. She has published cartoons and essays for years, with many of her cartoons focused on aging, memory, relationships and the realities of later life. She currently lives in Savannah, Georgia, where she continues writing, drawing and speaking about aging, creativity and personal growth.

J.J. said aging often creates anxiety because people become overwhelmed by loss, change and unrealistic expectations about what later life is supposed to look like.

She described “bold” as facing reality honestly and stepping up to do what needs to be done, even when the actions are small or unnoticed by others.

J.J. explained that humor helps people approach difficult conversations about aging because cartoons and comedy create emotional distance while still communicating truth.

She shared that many of the cultural narratives around aging are shifting, including the growing acceptance of using the word “old” openly and honestly.

J.J. talked about how loneliness became a turning point in her own life and inspired her to actively seek new friendships, experiences and communities.

She discussed the importance of staying open to reinvention later in life and said even small steps, like attending an art class or joining a group, can dramatically expand someone’s world.

J.J. emphasized that many fears around aging stem from clinging too tightly to the past instead of creating space for new experiences, relationships and possibilities.

She encouraged people to think proactively about aging by preparing emotionally, socially and practically for future changes rather than waiting until challenges become crises.