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The following is a recap from Varsity’s Roundtable, a weekly virtual gathering of senior living marketers and leaders from across the nation. For updates about future weekly Roundtable gatherings, submit your name and email address here.
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Caregiving doesn’t begin the day someone moves into senior living or needs help with daily tasks. For many adult daughters, it starts years earlier through the quiet, often invisible work of planning ahead, managing family relationships, carrying emotional burdens and constantly thinking about what’s next. While much of that work goes unnoticed, it can have a profound impact on both the daughter providing support and the aging parent receiving it.
During Varsity’s weekly Roundtable, Dr. Allison Alford, author of Good Daughtering (available on Amazon), explored the hidden realities of family caregiving, why daughters often shoulder responsibilities that others never see, and how senior living professionals can better understand and support them throughout the decision-making process. Below are a few Fresh Perspectives from her discussion.
DAUGHTERING IS MORE THAN CAREGIVING
Supporting an aging parent extends far beyond medications, appointments and daily tasks. Daughters also carry the invisible work of planning, worrying, preserving family traditions and holding relationships together. Recognizing that unseen work is the first step toward addressing it.
EMPATHY MATTERS DURING THE DECISION-MAKING PROCESS
Adult daughters are often balancing guilt, finances, family dynamics and their parent’s wishes all at once. Sales teams that acknowledge those emotions while treating both the daughter and parent with dignity build stronger trust and better relationships.
THE DAUGHTER’S ROLE EVOLVES AFTER THE MOVE
Moving into senior living doesn’t end a daughter’s responsibilities. Her role shifts from hands-on caregiving to advocacy, coordination and emotional support, helping ensure her parent continues to thrive while maintaining family connections.
AIM TO BE A “B+” DAUGHTER, NOT AN “A+” DAUGHTER
Burnout often happens because daughters feel responsible for everything. Setting realistic expectations and healthy boundaries allows them to support their parents while still making room for their own careers, families and well-being.
BECOME THE CEO OF THE CARE TEAM
Instead of trying to do every task yourself, coordinate the people around you. Delegating responsibilities to siblings, spouses, adult grandchildren and the senior living team creates a more sustainable approach and allows daughters to spend more quality time simply being a daughter.